Monster In Law

This is actually a movie title, starring Jennifer Lopez and Jane Fonda. Personally, I heard of too many tales and horror stories of living together with one. In today's modern society, I still can't believe that many people still expect the wife to stay under one roof with MIL. Two WOMEN under one roof? Well..unless the other one is her mum....the rest will never ever ever work out. Sisters, aunties, grandma, etc, etc...let's face it, we, women know ourselves much better! The only woman whom can tolerate us, is the one and only...important person in our lives....our MUM!

As for me, I am so close to mum that I dread to think living without her. The fact that I am moving out, once I wed....never fails to dampens my mood. Sigh. I am SOOOO used to having her with me. You see, my mum can't stay with me until my sis decides to move out/away or decide to run off with some guy. Hehe. Mothers. They are so determined to look after you, no matter young or old. :)

I do hope I don't need to stay with my MIL. Not that I dislike her. She is a nice lady, actually. But, living together? I know myself well enough. My character. My attitude. Compromise? I hope I don't need to...The best way to remain in a happy-ever-after r/ship...is to NOT live under one roof. I do hope my bf can understand about this.. (if he ever read this blog)


So, I am adding a 2nd wish list here (apart from smoking):
"I wish and wish, that I don't need to stay with MIL ever" :P

MIL is best kept away from the DIL. This way, r/ship will remain happy :D for all!!

Smoke gets in your eyes..

We had a heart to heart talk about his smoking habit. I know I cannot change him, only he can change if he wants to. Living a life together requires understanding, and tolerance of each other's worst habits. Like what I have mentioned..."We come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly..." How true this is!

My bf told me that, to him..."love is loving , caring , understanding , forgiving and accepting". Wow! Indeed, it wowed me! Didn't know he has deep thoughts like this :P

So, we made an agreement that there will be no smoking in the entire apartment, except open areas like the kitchen or outside of the apartment. That, he agreed, not to "avoid" an issue especially when I am boiling at the the said issue. That, he should communicate more of his feelings, his anger, his sadness or even dissapointment and let me know, how he feels. Of course, "Men will gaze into the horizon" when there's a challenge (according to John Gray), I do however hope, that he will open up to me more. That's how a r/ship will last. Communication.

Jitters gone! D Bride is BACK!

Pheee-weet!! I am so glad I got over the jitters now...errm, I hope it won't strike back! This is what I have done today:-
1) Finalise the list of favors to my cousin (whom will help to source from Guangzhou)
2) Bought the latest Bridal Magazine which cost me MYR 15.60 (ouch!)
3) Surfing the web to learn to make my own multimedia cartoon presentation (still waiting for help..)

I fell in love with this simple dress in the magazine. If I really lose enough weight, I think I would get it for my wedding dinner! It says here that it is a "Duchess satin dress with ribbon detal from Bridal Concept" Luv it :) But then again, it could be the model that makes the dress looks pretty...

Love is a 'decision'?

A good friend forwarded me a really interesting article. At times like this, reading such article does brought back a little hope for me. :) The article was titled, "Did I marry the right person?" Interesting.

I was once told, that fate does not determine our life path. Most people will surrender to fate - whether good or bad, but of course, mostly when bad things happens. But if we think deeply, it is really in us to determine what we want, and how it turns out to be. Our character, "interacts" outside our body and most of the time, our mind determines our action. Yes, we tend to follow the heart, emotions run high - but then again, the heart can't think by itself, isn't it? We just let our mind thinks that it's not working...let the heart take over. That's why we do many things emotionally, especially women.

So, happy or sad, it is in our hands. We control our emotions. That's why, I do agree that Love is a decision rather than pure emotional feeling. If you decide to love a man whole-heartedly, you will. If you decide to look elsewhere, you will have 101 reasons to justify such actions. If you decide to forgive, you will forget. If you decide to be unforgiven, you will not forget.

Cause and effect. That's why some say, "fate is in our hands"...come to think of it now...isn't that true? :)

Men from Mars?

Hmmm....what am I thinking? A lot. Good, bad...confused thoughts all over me.

Now that I have calmed down, I realise the smoking issue below is not the real issue that I am mad about. And I wasn't mad, really. I was sad. Sad, not because of his smoking. Sad, because, he thought he could smoke in the bathroom, close the door without me noticing it. Sad, because, he turned out to be such a cheeky person. Sad, because, he is not being honest. That's sad. The more I think about it, the worst it is.

I do agree that I think too much at times. Perhaps it's because I come from Venus, and he is from Mars. That is also the reason why, diamond is a girl's best friend...and for men....guess what.........a dog is their best friend :D

John Gray came out with another book, perhaps I should get a copy!

Weddophobia

A new word was born today: "weddophobia". You can't find it in any dictionary yet, and you sure can't google to find it's definition. This is the site where you will first discover this word - "weddophobia". Simply put, this is a condition experienced by homo sapiens - male or female..the fear of wedding, or more accurately, fear of marriage. I'm doomed. I am a weddophobia. Is it curable? No idea.

I just came back from a short trip with my bf, and weddophobia hits me again. Do I really want to spend my whole life with him? Can I live with him forever and ever? Less than six months of our wedding, it struck me again. It all started from a small incident.

Being booked on a non-smoking floor, my bf smoked in the bathroom! Already, I am putting up with his smoking habit (he knew I hated it) and he usually will walk away to smoke...but that day, he just decided to puff it in the bathroom. Can you imagine that?! How can a person be so lazy and self-centred....gosh! I tried to ignore it, but I can't. In the end, I snubbed him.

Total silence.

He continued playing with his handphone as if it doesn't matter.

Goodness me.

At that point of time, weddophobia came kicking in. What if he smokes in our home next time? (Although he already did now, but I am not staying there yet) I always find that kissing a smoker is akin to kissing an ashtray. Yuck! Imagine that! But then again, tolerance they say. There are millions of smokers in the world, and gosh...how can they stand it??!! My bf was previously a non-smoker. It was so hurtful on the day I found out that he finally gave into this temptation...after so many years. Stress, he said. Sad, I told him.

Weddophobia, weddophobia. I am now having second thoughts for 27th Dec 2008. Sigh.

Tick Tock Tick Tock

Oh, excuse me. That is the sound of my biological clock....tick-tocking away... :P

One of the main reason I made this decision to walk down the aisle is the fact that, I am ready to start a family. I used to dislike kids, but now, I simply adores them. Scary eh? They said that in every woman, there is always a motherly figure in us. That's why we tend to be caring and thoughtful. That's why, I love my dog. I do treat it as my kid. Scary? Yeah! But that's how it is, my dog is the love of my life, and I dread to think the days without her. (erm, of course, no 2 after my bf la)

Anyway, last Saturday was a date of the "cheh-cheh" (not aunties) with a girlfriend of mine together with her kid. Although tired, I did enjoy myself. I am truly amazed with the bond my friend has with her kid. It is superly amazing to foster such closeness. And strange enough, it reminds me of my dog.

So, I better hurry to tie the knot and hopefully, god willing, I will have someone calling me "mummy" and I might get the chance to gaze into him/her with a loving stare...just like the pic below:

Ex and Exes

Talk about an old friend. An old flame. A long lost buddy. Ex-classmate. Ex-schoolmate. Ex-Boyfriends. Ex-girlfriends. Ex-Lovers. Ex this and ex that.

Somehow, the excitement is still there. Amazing. Excitement here doesn't mean you fall head over heels again, but, more to re-discovering a lost emotion. Sweet thoughts will be replayed, moments will be cherished and how we wish, we could turn back time.

I do believe that things happen for a reason. Good things happen for a reason. So does bad things. In my opinion, good things happen to you too because you have been a good person. However, bad things happen not because your are bad though. It happens to good people too. Sometimes, it is a blessing in disguise. Most of us - homosapiens - take things for granted. That's why I do believe that bad things happen to remind you of how lucky you are. How blessed you are. :) The lessons will leave us stronger and many times, without fail, a better person. Life will become much more meaningful! Good and/or bad? It's karma.

I have met many wonderful people in my journey of life. Some of them are simply unforgetable. Like today, I met an old friend, whom reminds me of the older days. We still constantly keep in touch via emails..but due to busy schedules, there are just not enough time to pen down our thoughts or updates about our life. So, I was happy and glad to see the "0duc" online today, as we managed to chat a little, and even exchanged smilies. Simple things like this is enough to make my day. Sweet memories last forever, they say...how true it is!

Let us strive to work lesser, and have more time with our friends and family. And most important of all, more time for ourselves...like me...I still have a wedding to plan and gosh, it is already mid June!!!

Dear Thelma

Many times, we tend to offer advises after listening to other people's problem. Especially, relationship problems. Indeed, we usually empathise and try to understand the pain and hurt. That's why, women just love to read aritcles like "Dear Thelma", etc. I read something interesting today, and would like to replicate it here to share:

"Relationships are too complicated for anyone to simply unravel and put right. The parties involved are individuals with their own thoughts, judgements and feelings. (Hmm, so true isn't it? How many times, we would try to "put ourselves" into their shoes? How many times, have we listened and "judged"?)
How do we understand women who choose to be mistresses? Why do happily married men seek prostitutes and have affairs? What joy is there in secret tyrsts and messages when the bed is warm and the wife is sexy and gorgeous?

Men, and women, stray for their own reasons. Experts, counsellors and professionals can only guide and offer advise, and hope that those in need find the right solutions and happiness. (Friends, on the other hand, can always listen, perhaps give a beary hug...and a little advise from their own point of view.)
But, the truth is...those involved are the ones who have to live with the consequences of their actions. No one can share the pain and always, it is the children that suffers.

There is no airtight solution, no 10-point guides to success in marriages. We are individually responsible for our actions.

If we have love in our hearts and rational enough to understand the pain we can cause, then perhaps there will be better relationships."

Yeah right...if, and only ifs.... :P